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    6/22/2006

    kiss the rain

        回到上海就病了,脖子周围和胳膊内侧起了一块一块像淤血的红癍,不但痒而且疼。嗓子发炎接着就高烧不退。在校医一系列哄骗的检查和打针下,一点不见好转反而现在成哑巴了。乐乐逼着我去看江湖郎中,文哲干脆把他们东北的偏方都往我肚子里倒,结果还是越来越严重…………其实我现在需要的不是这些,只想安静的躺在床上,然后有她陪在身边。
         21号上海在下雨,听说家里也下了,其实我心底里是开心的,因为这一天是我和她的纪念日,这雨声也曾经代表着好多好多的含义。但是我转念又想,这一切也许不再重要了。在这些对我来说还算特别的日子里,上帝用身体和心灵一起考验着我,所以感谢他老人家的眷顾,感谢他送给我的这场大雨。
        些天虽然身体虚弱,但是脑袋却异常清醒。我反复思考着人与人之间应有的距离,对于远距离的爱情来说,能够朝夕相处是一件多么另人奢望而又甜蜜的事,但是对于能每天见面天天相对的爱情来说,能够保持一份距离甚至小别几日又是多么的智慧和潇洒。我向来羡慕能对感情收放自如的人,也庆幸自己没有变成这样潇洒的人。朦胧中和乐乐聊天,我让她告诉我爱怕什么?她说爱怕怀疑,怕沉默,怕背叛,总之怕的好多好多,但是真的爱了也就什么都不怕了,即使知道会伤的很深很深。我笑了,这个小丫头仿佛在趁机诉说着她心里的委屈。
        印象中我好久没这么痛快淋漓的生病了,也没有这么脆弱的在异乡待过,我的人生还有哪些灾难没有经历呢?地震?火灾?洪水?矿难?或者战争?我并不是有自虐倾向,只是想看看自己到底能承受多少东西,到底能走的多远,还要再经历一些什么,我很好奇,又不甘心被命运打败,所以会一直这么固执的斗争下去。可是我在乎的还是很多,我会想家,会挂念爸妈,会担心帅哥有没有新鲜的鱼吃,她又能不能照顾好自己,朋友们是否都顺利~~~我没有堕落的资本,也没有背叛者的勇气,只有一颗不安分的心。

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    ^^婷メwrote:
    抱抱~~小可怜~~
    June 23

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